Hunter and I met in Milwaukee in 2002, when we were both doing a season-long acting internship at the Milwaukee Repertory Theatre. He was from NY, but had just completed his BFA in Dallas... I was from Chicago, but was in my 3rd year of grad school at Ohio U, and had defected from the "normal" track of doing the internship in Cincinnati. I wanted to be close to home for various reasons, including that Chicago was where I intended to pursue the early stages of my career, so I found another option, was lucky enough to be one of the 12 interns accepted, and my grad program was kind enough to let me go.
I was in a dying, fruitless 2-year relationship with another man when I met Hunter. And, truth be told, I didn't really notice him for a few months (even though there were only 11 other interns.) But, as I built up the courage to leave one relationship, another one was tickling at my heartstrings. I couldn't tell if I really liked him, or if I just liked the idea of him. He was gentle, kind and patient (all qualities that none of my ex's had ever presented). I was so curious, I just had to explore further!
So, I recruited my best galpal (heretofore known as MaPo) to chaperone as we proceeded to kidnap Hunter and make him spend the day with us so I could find out if my crush was for real. I'll be honest. I was the antithesis of subtle. I was the very definition of obvious. Look up 'forward' in the dictionary, and there's an image of me that day. I had never been so bold. Ain't no shame in my game.
Long story short, we had an amazing day and didn't leave eachother's side until after midnight. He tried to kiss me, but I wouldn't let him. I was so intoxicated by the energy between us that I walked the wrong way out of his room that night, before I ran straight to The Best Lady's room and giddily confessed that I was, in fact, 100% certain that Hunter was the real deal. The next day I broke it off with my ex, and took up with the nicest, most sweet and funny best friend/partner/hottie I could ever dream of. And I haven't looked back for one second.
6 years later, I look back at my decision to "break the mold" of my grad program and go to Milwaukee with a real sense of appreciation to the Universe. Yes, I was closer to home and the location of my early career... but I was really brought to the land of beer and cheese to meet my soulmate.
Girls, I hope if you're reading this, you have found your version of this bliss. But, if you're wishfully reading.... dreaming of the day you find your match, hear this advice:
Don't go for the bad boys. You can't cure them, save them, or make them happy. They don't want that from you. You will find someone better for you. Go with someone who treats you as nicely as you could ever imagine. I promise, being truly and deeply loved never gets boring.
Next up, the best proposal story ever. Really. I know, 'cuz we won a contest, yo.




















3 comments:
Love is never boring, fo sho. :)
Congrats on finding your man! And thanks for the candid advice.
So, I’ve been reading your blog backward since I came in about two months before your wedding… and I have to say that your story of meeting and deciding on Hunter is almost exactly the same as mine with my amazing guy, and you are so right… being truly loved never ever gets old. All relationships should be this easy. I hope we end up with a story even just half as amazing as yours. Congratulations on everything.
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